Sunday, September 3, 2006

My Family Part2

Have you ever thought of a very important person to you being substituted? Perhaps it is going to be another point of change in my life. I don't know. Though it seem to be more a positive change than a negative one, but it still will impact my life, and me.

He has always been someone I love to rely on. He has been the man I trusted a lot. The only one that I believe who will never make me fall off from his back. He has been the only one who allows me to dance on his bare foots. The one who taught me uncountable things in life. The one who gave me a wonderful childhood. The one who brought me almost half the globe. The man who gave me a good environment of education. And the only one who gave me goodnight kiss every single night before I end my day. My dad, a person who I have lost contact with for more than I can remember.

Not until I grew up, today, I never knew that he was totally a different man from my thoughts. He might be a great father to me but totally not a good son or a good husband. Its only recently that I actaully found out my parents are not even married. No one has ever mentioned about it to me. They just got together because of me. Obviously, you knew what has happened.

Why arent they officially married couples? Just because he was an irresponsible man. He has a family at the very first place, even before he knew my mum and has left them behind. That made me have extra of two elder brothers and a step-mother.

He then left my family when I was 10 and told me he will be back when I'm sitting for my UPSR. Great. I have even gotten my SPM results and he is still not back. We've lost hope on him. He made our lifes miserable after he left. He cheated us and is never back. Honestly, I dont even know where is he now. Is he still alive or not.? *touchwood* If he is, I bet he has a family right there.

I've never miss him until I really knew what had happened. He isnt a good man afterall. I'm so worried that my brothers would have all his bad habits. And yes, all his characteristics can see clearly seen on my younger brother, the bad ones especially. Whenever I forgotten how he actaully looks like, I just need to glance on my eldest brother and he will appear right infront of me. They look real alike, even their voice. And lastly, my second brother has all his knowledge on doing business. What about me? I have his bad habits of lying. Sounds very bad dont I? But I'm improving now. Very straight forward like my mum. ;p And the best thing I had from him is the sense of direction.

I really wish to have at least a little bit of news of him right now. I don't know. Whether he knows that he is wrong or not, he is still someone I love. But I really have a bad feeling.... And at the same time, my mum has found someone to be her official one. I don't know how should I face this. I know she doesnt really want to but she has no better choices. This guy, whom i really dislike has lessen her big burden ever since my dad left us. I really don't know. He can get whatever I want but not a real family that I want.....

I never really want to call another guy, "Dad."


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